Saturday, February 20, 2010

Richard Sees Them All Dye...paradoy scene/fan fiction


By Christine Dagnelli (theynameditright)

We are looking at the beach, many people standing around their tents. John Locke and Richard are talking, Sun is standing with Ben tired of waiting, tired of wanting, she needs answers and she is going to get them now.

Sun storms over to Richard and Locke, Ben in tow

SUN: Where you here in 1977? Did you know these people, Hugo Reyes, Jack Shepherd, Kate Austen, do you remember them?

RICHARD: Yes, I was here, I remember these people very clearly, I remember meeting them all, but I think they had different names. …. I remember I watched them all dye.

….cue spooky Lost music and flash back whoosh sound……

Bill and Ted run across the screen doing the Wayne’s world did-il-e-doot, did-il-e-doot

We are back in the 70’s at Jacobs cabin in the jungle, only its not all old and crappy, it’s a happen place! There are Chinese lanterns around, a big boar roasting with an apple in its mouth (oo some garden of Eden motif) people are jamming to Geronimo Jackson, drinking some dharma beer, playing games. We see Hurley, Jack, Kate, Jin and Sayid all sitting around these wood buckets with shirts in their hands. Sawyer is drinking a beer and looking at Kate’s boobies while Juliet is off somewhere else. In enters Richard.

HURLEY: Uh oh, isn’t that eyeliner dude, do you think he might be, you know pissed we didn’t invite him.

SAWYER: Let me handle this stay puff (To Richard) Hey there Richard, come to have some boar and Beer? Let me introduce you to some of my pals here you may not know. This is Stay Puft, Freckles, Captain Falafel, and Doc

RICHARD: Nice to meet you all…hey are you guys making T-shirts?

(Camera pans around all of our oceanic survivors, they have t-shirts and are dipping them in buckets, they pause in their action and they have serious looks on their faces)

SAYID: Yes, we are making shirts as you say.

RICHARD: Mind if I…. {as he takes a shirt}

SAYID (cutting him off) I wouldn’t if I were you

HURLEY: Yeah sorry dude these are like, just for us

JACK: (really whiney and yelling) Give it BACK!

RICHARD: Hey sorry, I don’t want any trouble here

Richard sits down on a log and sadly watches the oceanic crew make their T-Dyed “ We Time Traveled to the 70’s and all we got are these lousy T shirts”, for themselves, their little club. Where’s Richard’s Club? This is so much like the rest of the island, where does he fit in? Where are the other 500-year-old people?

Whooshy flash back music

Bill and Ted run across the screen doing the Wayne’s world did-il-e-doot, did-il-e-doot

RICHARD; I couldn’t believe it, they wouldn’t share, I just had to watch them all dye (Richard starts to cry). STORY OF MY LIFE! Always following everyone, watching things but not doing anything!!! I am so alone

Locke and Ben exchange “wow he’s losing it” looks. One of them makes the coo coo sign

SUN: Well, what happened to them?

RICHARD: (suddenly pulls it together) Funny, as it turns out the dye was poisonous. Yeah they all got sick and dropped dead right there on the spot. Then we ate know because were aliens.(offers Sun something) Fish stick?

Flash to black LOST

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